Return to CERN

I’ll be returning to the “CERN area” tonight – my flight leaves in just over an hour. It’s been a whirlwind last couple of weeks . . . in fact, this whole month has been one crazy professional sacrifice. I’ve spent nearly a month now being jet-lagged: Geneva, to Dallas, back to Geneva, then back to Dallas 10 days later, then off to Davis, CA the next day, then back to Dallas, then off to my sister’s wedding on the US East Coast, then back to Dallas, and now back to CERN. Next week, I’ll be in Israel for a Higgs workshop for my Beyond-the-Standard Model Higgs Subgroup

But, then, this is what I signed up for. I still love physics . . . but this travel is both amazing and exhausting. Sadly, I’m getting used to it. The idea of changing 7 time zones is becoming a nearly casual exercise. I just look forward to being rooted at CERN again for a month so I can focus. Focus is important . . . in fact, it’s THE most important thing

So . . . one more night flight and then CERN!

Down Heathrow way

After a sleep-filled flight from Dallas to London, I’ve made it to my layover in Heathrow. I am not sure if the breakfast I just had will perk me up or knock me down, but it is a heck of a way to start the final leg of the journey to CERN.

The hardest part of doing science

When you commit to scientific research on an international scale, you know you’re going to be traveling. This spring I have an approved teaching leave to focus on research. I will be using it to spend as much time at CERN as possible. This is good, because it means I can much better participate in ATLAS physics and fulfill my responsibilities and duties as an ATLAS Higgs subgroup co-convener.

But there is a price. Jodi and I are a married couple, both in physics. I need to be at CERN; she needs to remain in the States to work with her group and collaborate on her experiment. This means a LOT of time apart, with the biggest chunk being a few months right up front. This will mark the longest we have been apart since graduate school, and certainly the longest time apart since we were married.

When we parted at the airport today, it was nearly impossible to go. When I did manage to commit to walking to my gate, it felt like somebody shoved a whole apple down my throat and set my eyes on fire.

People do this all the time. I get that. But it is always hard, especially when it is because the focus for the next year needs to be on our science. We are both in critical years, and we understand that a little sacrifice will go a long way. That doesn’t mean we like it; it means we recognize unpleasant necessity when we see it.

My flight will leave soon. I will write as much as I can while I am at CERN. Borrowing a great idea from a friend of mine, I might even try a “photo a day” thing. Writing helps me make sense of things. Writing helps me sort out my thoughts and feelings about research and life. Over the next months, I will need to do a LOT of sorting and a lot of distracting . . . because I already miss home.